...every office was like this
The embedding link didn't work so sorry.... here's the link you'll just have to surf there:
Battle of the Century?
Friday, June 20, 2008
a letter to a friend.
dear jules.
i hate you.
i will never sleep again.** (see note)
love sara.
** NOTE: http://www.sporcle.com/games/
i hate you.
i will never sleep again.** (see note)
love sara.
** NOTE: http://www.sporcle.com/games/
coming soon...
bad date story #2. just hold your horses. i'm kind of busy. school is finishing. i'm applying to graduate school. and my car is dying. slowly and painfully. the mechanic told me to drive stanley until he dies. so sad! so i am fixing to be 30g in the hole in about 12 months. aren't you envious. ha. no really. you are. i know it.
The solution to all my problems...
We single people have a tough lot in life. We suffer through so many things, are harassed regularly about why we aren't yet married, what could possibly be wrong with us that someone hasn't snatched us up yet and what, don't we want to get married??!!! Well... in perusing a particular yahoo group posting, I think I have solved the problem of the singles.
Please read the following:
Here's the solution, not only for the PoorBoy who cannot get a good haircut (which I can do pretty well - better than haircuttery at least...I think... right? Or...no???), but also for those of us who may struggle with the perpetual singles scene.
Wow, it's so simple. So. Actually, I already have a pair of clippers. So I should just buzz it all off then? And then I'll be in grad school, I'll have a new car (Stanley is dying a slow and painful death), and the man of my dreams will swoop around the corner and put a ring on my finger, and we'll not have any debt and life will be happily ever after. And all because I buzzed my hair!!!!
If only I'd known this years ago, I could also be so lucky as to have 30 children following me around already. *sigh* the things you miss out on...
*names have been changed to protect the clueless and rude...
Please read the following:
- 16a.
-
STILL ISO a barber I can trust
Posted by: "Poorboy still needing a trim"*
Thu Jun 19, 2008 3:01 pm (PDT)
So.... nobody responded to this question the last time I asked it, but I thought I'd try again.
I'm looking for a barber/stylist that won't butcher my hair, as Haircuttery barbers are wont to do. I'm looking for quality and professionalism, but I'd rather not pay more than $20. Any suggestions? - PoorBoy
Here's the solution, not only for the PoorBoy who cannot get a good haircut (which I can do pretty well - better than haircuttery at least...I think... right? Or...no???), but also for those of us who may struggle with the perpetual singles scene.
- 16b.
-
Re: STILL ISO a barber I can trust
Posted by: "Man with all the answers"*
Thu Jun 19, 2008 4:01 pm (PDT)
Spend 20 bucks and go buy some clippers, then buzz your head. It's been a
while but when I finally decided to buzz my head, a couple weeks later I had
a girlfriend, a new job and did quite well on the LSAT. I am now married to
that girl and in law school.
Think about it. It will save you so much money in the long run, and who
knows what else might happen, your hair might be holding you back. - -AnswerMan
Wow, it's so simple. So. Actually, I already have a pair of clippers. So I should just buzz it all off then? And then I'll be in grad school, I'll have a new car (Stanley is dying a slow and painful death), and the man of my dreams will swoop around the corner and put a ring on my finger, and we'll not have any debt and life will be happily ever after. And all because I buzzed my hair!!!!
If only I'd known this years ago, I could also be so lucky as to have 30 children following me around already. *sigh* the things you miss out on...
*names have been changed to protect the clueless and rude...
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Bad date story #1
This is for all the lurkers out there... you know who you are.
I don't think I've chronicled this aspect of my life yet. And since I like to humiliate myself for people who don't know me, I've decided to tell you all this delightful story. I hope you enjoy it. This is Dating 101, according to Sara. This is also a story I tell one of my classes when we talk about dating. It's part of the curriculum to talk about dating and relationships. It's just too bad all my lessons are what not to do. There are some important lessons here. Pay attention kids.
Once upon a time, long long ago (my sophomore year of college) and far far away (in Provo), I studied in the library. Not just anywhere in the library. I studied on the 2nd floor of the HBLL, near the maps. See, not many people go digging around the maps, so it was VERY quiet, and there wasn't a lot of people-watching to do to distract me from my studies. In true library fashion, there was a little man behind a desk at a computer. Strangely, my best-good friend at the time had met him online and then gone out on a date with him. She told me about this guy and that he worked when and where I studied. I somehow started talking to him. Best-good friend (heretofore referred to as BGF) said I should date him. Like I can just say "Hey, you be my boyfriend now." That might work with preschoolers, but usually in college that kind of backfires.
Soooo eventually, this boy asked me out on a date. I say eventually, but really it didn't take him very long at all. I think BGF had some hand in telling him to ask me out because I didn't instigate it. Anyway, so he picks me up and we start driving north. And we keep going north. On University Ave. And we keep going north. Do you know where we're going? I figure we're going over to the movie theaters at the mouth of the canyon. But we just kept right on going at full speed.
We continue driving up the canyon and I start to wonder what is going on. I asked what we were doing or where we're going and all I got was a "you'll see." Squaw Peak, the makeout point? No no, that's for high schoolers, apparently. No, we pulled into a park. Vivian Park, about halfway up the canyon. At this point of my life I'm pretty clueless and naive, but I'm smart enough to know that there is NOTHING in Vivian park, especially after dark. Nothing. So he pulls into a parking lot, pulls the car around to a dark, unlit corner and parks the car, turning it off. I'm not quite sure what's going to happen to me. I have my cell phone and debit card in my pocket (never go on a date without a phone, chapstick and $20 in your pocket!), so I know if I have to make a run for it, well he's a much bigger guy than me and I could easily get back to the highway and thumb a ride back to the valley if I needed to. He lays his seat back and wants me to start kissing on him. I don't.
Let's just pause here. Lets talk about some dating do's and don't's.
Back to our list....
Boys and girls are different. Boys are generally visual. Girls are generally not. Boys have hair ALLL over their bodies. Girls should not. Girls parts are not weird. Boy parts are. Showing your parts around is not not not not not going to entice a girl to kiss on you if she's not already. Not any decent girl, anyway.
So hopefully needless to say, I asked if he would take me back home. I don't think I was that polite about it. And I'm leaving out some disgusting details, thank your lucky stars. Thinking about it makes me want to put my fingers in my ears and scream "la la la la la la la" until all the nasty memories go away. He agreed to take me home, and thankfully didn't force me to do anything, but he pouted the whole way home. What a horrible way to ruin a date! We had a nice conversation on the way up, and silence on the way back. It was really too bad that he turned out so filthy.
So no, I didn't have to thumb my way home. I didn't have to call for help. And I didn't have to use my chapstick (unfortunately - had it been a respectable date , I wouldn't have minded kissing on him, he was actually really cute and a lot of fun. I just don't respond well to being bossed around!!! And too bad he turned out to be a bit more freaky for my tastes).
I saw him a few years later, just happened to see him across the way around town one day. He had tattoos and piercings, had gone all tough-guy biker-dude and gotten all kinds of weird. It's not like I didn't see that coming.
Unfortunately for me, this is not the end of the bad date stories. There are many many more to come. All somewhat equally nasty. It's starting to make me wonder if I have something stamped across my forehead, like "Tramp" or "trashy ho" or "take me, I'm easy" or "will work for dinner" or......... Um, do I? You know, as a friend, it's your responsibility to tell someone if they have food stuck in their teeth, mascara across their face or a big "I'm a trashy girl, take me" stamp across their forehead! Sheesh.
Some people tell their love story on their blog. Not me. I tell horror stories. And maybe you'll understand why now I have some hesitations about marriage...
I don't think I've chronicled this aspect of my life yet. And since I like to humiliate myself for people who don't know me, I've decided to tell you all this delightful story. I hope you enjoy it. This is Dating 101, according to Sara. This is also a story I tell one of my classes when we talk about dating. It's part of the curriculum to talk about dating and relationships. It's just too bad all my lessons are what not to do. There are some important lessons here. Pay attention kids.
Once upon a time, long long ago (my sophomore year of college) and far far away (in Provo), I studied in the library. Not just anywhere in the library. I studied on the 2nd floor of the HBLL, near the maps. See, not many people go digging around the maps, so it was VERY quiet, and there wasn't a lot of people-watching to do to distract me from my studies. In true library fashion, there was a little man behind a desk at a computer. Strangely, my best-good friend at the time had met him online and then gone out on a date with him. She told me about this guy and that he worked when and where I studied. I somehow started talking to him. Best-good friend (heretofore referred to as BGF) said I should date him. Like I can just say "Hey, you be my boyfriend now." That might work with preschoolers, but usually in college that kind of backfires.
Soooo eventually, this boy asked me out on a date. I say eventually, but really it didn't take him very long at all. I think BGF had some hand in telling him to ask me out because I didn't instigate it. Anyway, so he picks me up and we start driving north. And we keep going north. On University Ave. And we keep going north. Do you know where we're going? I figure we're going over to the movie theaters at the mouth of the canyon. But we just kept right on going at full speed.
We continue driving up the canyon and I start to wonder what is going on. I asked what we were doing or where we're going and all I got was a "you'll see." Squaw Peak, the makeout point? No no, that's for high schoolers, apparently. No, we pulled into a park. Vivian Park, about halfway up the canyon. At this point of my life I'm pretty clueless and naive, but I'm smart enough to know that there is NOTHING in Vivian park, especially after dark. Nothing. So he pulls into a parking lot, pulls the car around to a dark, unlit corner and parks the car, turning it off. I'm not quite sure what's going to happen to me. I have my cell phone and debit card in my pocket (never go on a date without a phone, chapstick and $20 in your pocket!), so I know if I have to make a run for it, well he's a much bigger guy than me and I could easily get back to the highway and thumb a ride back to the valley if I needed to. He lays his seat back and wants me to start kissing on him. I don't.
Let's just pause here. Lets talk about some dating do's and don't's.
- Do ask girls out on a date.
- Do have a plan
- Do plan something fun
- Do not drive up the canyon
- Do not assume what you think will be a fun-filled evening is necessarily your date's idea of a fun-filled evening. It is important to talk about your plans and be clear about what you are doing before you actually leave the house. That gives you an opportunity to back out of the date before you are in a compromising situation.
Back to our list....
- Do not whip out the little general. Do not. Do not. Do not!!!!
- And do not think that introducing the general will entice a woman to kiss on you. Anywhere.
Boys and girls are different. Boys are generally visual. Girls are generally not. Boys have hair ALLL over their bodies. Girls should not. Girls parts are not weird. Boy parts are. Showing your parts around is not not not not not going to entice a girl to kiss on you if she's not already. Not any decent girl, anyway.
So hopefully needless to say, I asked if he would take me back home. I don't think I was that polite about it. And I'm leaving out some disgusting details, thank your lucky stars. Thinking about it makes me want to put my fingers in my ears and scream "la la la la la la la" until all the nasty memories go away. He agreed to take me home, and thankfully didn't force me to do anything, but he pouted the whole way home. What a horrible way to ruin a date! We had a nice conversation on the way up, and silence on the way back. It was really too bad that he turned out so filthy.
So no, I didn't have to thumb my way home. I didn't have to call for help. And I didn't have to use my chapstick (unfortunately - had it been a respectable date , I wouldn't have minded kissing on him, he was actually really cute and a lot of fun. I just don't respond well to being bossed around!!! And too bad he turned out to be a bit more freaky for my tastes).
I saw him a few years later, just happened to see him across the way around town one day. He had tattoos and piercings, had gone all tough-guy biker-dude and gotten all kinds of weird. It's not like I didn't see that coming.
Unfortunately for me, this is not the end of the bad date stories. There are many many more to come. All somewhat equally nasty. It's starting to make me wonder if I have something stamped across my forehead, like "Tramp" or "trashy ho" or "take me, I'm easy" or "will work for dinner" or......... Um, do I? You know, as a friend, it's your responsibility to tell someone if they have food stuck in their teeth, mascara across their face or a big "I'm a trashy girl, take me" stamp across their forehead! Sheesh.
Some people tell their love story on their blog. Not me. I tell horror stories. And maybe you'll understand why now I have some hesitations about marriage...
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